Neighbors?
by kschmidtsacutie
Summary: Someones finally moving into the house across the street from Kendall and they have a son, Logan. who knew having neighbors could change his life forever. Slash, Kogan boyxboy Warning for slight swearing and sexual situations. What happens when Logan's past haunts ease read and review. First fanfiction,(Look on youtube using this- /watch?v lDiue7tvNB8
1. Hi, I'm Kendall Knight

Neighbors?

**Disclaimer: I don't own big time rush sadly, oh the things I would do if I did. I only own the plot and some characters later on**

As I stepped down the stars glancing out the window I couldn't help but be curious when I noticed a moving truck parked in the driveway of the house across the street. No one had lived in that house for over 7 years. "Big brother!" my little sister exclaimed as I walked into the kitchen. "Hey baby sis are you excited for tomorrow?" I asked before taking the seat next to her. "Nah, it's only eighth grade" she replied calmly. "What about you big brother, it's your senior year! "She said happily. "I guess" I said. She was about to reply when I heard the doorbell ring. I opened the door to reveal three people I'd never seen before.

"Hello I'm David Mitchell, and this is my wife Johanna and our son Logan". He shook his hand then greeted David's wife, I turned to greet Logan when I finally saw him I noticed how simply breathtaking he is. His eyes the most gorgeous chocolate brown you'll ever see. His cute little button nose and a crooked smile to die for. And to top it off DIMPLES, oh I'm such a goner I thought." Hi I'm Kendall knight" he smiled and went to shake my hand when our skin touched the electricity was undeniably.

"Katie!" I yelled "Coming!" She yelled back. "What's up...who are they?" She questioned after she looked up from her Game Boy. "Hi were the Mitchells were moving into the house across the street" Joanna responded well extending a hand towards Katie. She cautiously shook it well smiling excitedly (not many people moved into the tiny town that is Stockton Minnesota) "Hey, I'm Katie" she then turned away from the Mitchells and turn towards I.

"Kenny I'm going to Tyler's, see you at dinner" she tried to head to the door but I stopped her before she could leave. "Is mom okay with this, I don't want to get in trouble like last time". Katie nodded then left smiling at the awkward looking Mitchells. "Be careful baby sis, love you" I said Katie immediately replied with a "aren't I always, love you to big brother". I turned back to the Mitchells "sorry about that, why don't you come to dinner tonight, I bet my mom would love to meet you guys" i said happily. My smile getting impossibly wider when they all nodded smiling. "Great how's seven?" "Perfect" Mr. Mitchell replied quickly. "Well we must get going we still have a lot of unpacking to do" Joanna said before waving. Then we all said their goodbyes.

As I closed the door I couldn't stop thinking about the doe-eyed boy I'd just met and I got increasingly more excited for dinner tonight. I called my mom telling her about dinner and she was ecstatic. I decided to make spaghetti both vegetarian (for Katie) and normal for everyone else. I ran to get ready I jumped into the shower and changed into a blue and green plaid shirt that made my emerald green eyes pop, black skinny jeans and my checkered vans. I combed my hair so my bangs covered my forehead.

As I was walking down the stairs I heard the front door open which means either Katie or my mom was home. "Kendall?" I heard my mother yell, "Coming" I responded quickly. I ran down the rest of the stairs then hugged my tired looking mother. "How was your day mama?" "The hospital was so busy, but besides that my day was great! What smells so good?" She questioned. "I made spaghetti, I hope that's okay I just didn't want you to have to cook after working so hard all day". "No that's great sweetie, and you know you're a much better cook then me, I think Carlos is rubbing off on you" Carlos is my amazingly talented best friend who loves to cook. "Where's Katie?" "She said you said it was okay that she went to Tyler, she should be home soon thought".

As if on cue the front door opened and Katie waltzed in, "Mama" she yelled happily, she rarely got to see her mother because she's always working. "hey Katie-bug go clean up were going to have company over soon" mama knight said. Katie ran up the stairs well I went to go check on my food, it was almost ready and the Mitchells would be here any minute. Katie came barreling down the stair only to be stopped by her mother. "Katie-bug? Can you set the table for 6?" Katie nodded and made her way to the dining room, "thanks sweetie!" Mama Knight yelled. Five minutes later the food was ready and the table was set, now the knights were patiently waiting for the Mitchells to arrive. I looked at the clock just as it chimed seven, almost instantly there was a knock on the door.

_The Mitchells were there..._

**AN: so here's the first chapter to my very first fan fiction! Hope you enjoyed it! I'm hoping to update once a week no certain day or time. Every other chapter should be longer than this one. If you enjoyed this please r&amp;r and share this to your friends. Maybe even follow or favorite the story? No... Okay then. If you have an idea for a one-shot feel free to message me because ill more than likely write it and dedicate it to you asap. Ok Lots of love!**

**XOXO **

**-Sky**


	2. Getting to know the boy next door

**Disclaimer: I don't own big time rush, But I wish I did. I only own the plot and some characters later on**

I was so excited and nervous when I heard the knock on the door. Calm down I had to tell myself as I made my way to the door. As soon as I opened the door I was greeted by an adorable crooked smile. I invited them in and lead them to the dining room, where Katie and my mom waited. When the Mitchells entered the room both knight women stood. "Hello, I'm Jennifer Knight, Kendall and Katie's mother. It's great to meet you!" she said then extended her hand to Joanna, who quickly shook it. "Your house is lovely" Joanna said releasing my mother's hand. "Thank you very much" Mrs. Knight then shook David's hand, "It's very nice to meet you, I'm David, and this is Joanna my wife and our son Logan". My mother greeted Logan who was smiling sweetly at her.

"Well why don't we take a seat?" Jennifer said. She sat at one head of the table directly across from Mr. Mitchell. Katie sat on her right and I sat on Mr. Mitchell's Left with Logan directly in front of me and his mother next to him. "It smells delicious in here" Logan announced I stood to go get the dinner from the kitchen. Katie followed me to help me get the sides. We set the food down and Logan licked his lips." I hope you like spaghetti" I said, the Mitchells' all nodded their heads excitedly. Everyone served themselves and began to eat occasionally speaking. "so Logan, how old are you?" my mother asked after everyone finished there dinner." Oh um I'm 16" he replied shyly. "Oh so you're going to be a junior this year?" I questioned. "Nope I am going to be a senior as of tomorrow, what about you?" " I'm 17 and this is my senior year as well, I'm guessing were going to the same high school considering there's only one in this town" I replied. Guess what he did! He laughed at my pathetic joke, his laugh so … I don't even know how to describe because the words adorable, great, amazing just doesn't do it justice. "If you'd like I could show you around school tomorrow and introduce you to some pretty awesome people" just as I finished my sentence the doorbell rang.

"I'll get it" I muttered as I stood. I opened the door and was amediantly embraced my two people and I automatically knew who it was. "Ken-doll" "Hi Carlitos, Jamie" James glared at me when I used his childhood nickname that he hated. "Were bored lets hang!" James exclaimed. "I can't, we have our new neighbors over, want to meet them?" "Sure whatever" they answer at the same time. The three of us walked into the dinner room. James picked Katie up and then sat down putting Katie into his lap. "Hey Katie-bug" James said she smiled and blushed. She would never admit it but she had a major crush on James. Carlos being the idiot he is came and sat in my lap then said "hey ken-doll" just like James did to Katie the only thing different is I didn't smile and blush like Katie, I actually got quite annoyed because even though Carlos looked small he still weighed a lot. "Carlitos get off" I looked up when I realized people were laughing to be more specific everyone was laughing.

"James, Carlos this is David, Joanna and their son Logan they just moved into the house across the street" my mom said. David, Joanna, and Logan this is James and Carlos they are Kendall's best friends you'll see them a lot" my mother spoke well smiling. Carlos finally got off of me when my legs lost feeling only because my mom went and got another chair for him. "Guys, Logan's going to be a senior this year, how cool is that" I said happily. The boys smiled we all loved having new people in town. "Guys why don't we go up to my room and hang out, want to come with Logan?" He nodded and we all stood and walked up the stairs.

"So Logan where did you move from?" James asked. "I moved from Richland Texas because my dad got a promotion". He smiled as he talked, god how I love his smile already. James and Carlos must have noticed because they started snickering, there were only 5 people who I was gay and those five people were Katie(she actually figured it out on her own), my mom, James, my cover girlfriend Jo and Carlos. People couldn't know that Mr. Popular is gay so I have to pretend to be the all American jock. Yes that's right I'm the captain of the hockey team and dating the head cheerleader, well fake dating actually. She's only using me to be more popular and I'm okay with it. Someone cleared their throat breaking me out of my thoughts, "what?" I mumbled, "I have to go but I will see you three at school tomorrow, it was great meeting you guys, bye knight" Logan said then winked at me, was he flirting with me? The butterflies in my stomach were undeniable.

"Dude! You were so fucking obvious!" James whisper- yelled as soon as Logan was out the door. "I have no idea what you're talking about" I muttered decided to play dumb hoping they would drop it. "Aww, Jamie our little Kendy is growing up" Carlos stated innocently. "Shut up!" I semi yelled, "You know I have a girlfriend and there's nothing I can do about it" I stated slightly angry. "Dude just come out like Carlos and I did when we started dating", "that's different you had each other" I said angrily. "And now you have Logan" James stated in a "duh" voice. "I don't even know if he likes me like that idiots, he could and probably is straight. And even if he was gay why would he go for someone like me". "You were too busy off in your own world to realize he was staring at you just as much as you were. You both had that stupid goofy grin too.". " Jamie just drop it, Kendall's getting mad". "Damn straight I am, you better shut the fuck up unless you want to kicked out of my fucking house" Kendall said through gritted teeth. James knew had pushed him too far so he decide it was time for him and Carlos to leave. "See you tomorrow ken-doll" Carlos stated happily, "Bye Carlitos" I replied quickly before closing the door.

_They were right I did have it bad for the boy next door… _

**AN: thanks for reading the second chapter to Neighbors. I really hope you enjoyed it. I'll be updating ASAP. Again I'm taking request for any kogan one-shot. Lots of love**

**XOXO **

**-Sky**


	3. Maybe

**AN: Yay chapter three! I'm so happy that you guys like this, I have to admit I was nervous to post this. I have quite a few people I would like to that so let's get to them: ****Zomgaimee, Logan,** **Brutus13130,** **Eaglenerd,** **spookje10,** **Koganfan345,** **laurieschmidt,** **TheLoganTrain.**** And the person who inspired me to actually upload something:**

**Breanna Dominque**

**Thank you all so much! You guys are all amazing! Now on to the story!**

I woke up to my alarm blaring. I slowly cracked open one eye so I could see the correct button to hit. I got up and found myself instantly attracted to the window; I looked out on to realize I could see directly into Logan's room. Oh my god he was changing, my mind started screaming for me to run away but I couldn't look away. Kendall stop making this harder on yourself I thought. I hesitantly left the window and walked to my attached bathroom. I undressed then turned on the shower. After taking care of a problem and washing myself, I got out then walked to my closet. What to wear on the first day of my senior year I thought to myself. I decided on gray skinny jeans and a black graphic tee. I fixed my hair then grabbed my wallet cell phone and bag and left my room.

"Good morning Kendall" my mom said as soon as I was in the kitchen. "Morning mom, baby sis" I said smiling. "Why you all smiley, you hate mornings?" my mom questioned, I simply shrugged. "I know" Katie suddenly announced, "He's got a crush on Logan" I glared at her well she smiled innocently at me. "You need to respect my privacy more" I muttered before grabbing an apple and making my way out the door with a frown on my face. "Morning Knight" I turned and noticed Logan "Mitchell" I said well waving then turning towards my car. Well getting into my car I noticed Logan start walking down the street. I quickly pulled out my driveway and pulled up next to him rolling down my window. "Want a ride?" I asked politely. He simply nodded muttering a thank you as he entered the passenger side.

"So Logan are you excited for school" I said trying to make small talk during the drive to school. "I guess it's nice to already know someone" he said well shrugging. "Yea I get it, I'll make sure to introduce you to some awesome people" I said excitedly well pulling into the school parking lot parking my f150 next to James mustang. God was his family rich I thought jealously, I had to by my own car, it took year to save up for it and he turns sixteen and immediately has a brand new mustang but whatever. Logan and I exited the car and walked through the school doors. I was immediately greeted with hugs and high fives. Did I forget to mention I'm the most popular guy in the school … oops? I hate it so much, everyone looks up to you and you can never really just be …yourself.

We walking into the cafeteria and I lead Logan to my table so I could introduce him to the rest of the group. As soon as James spotted Logan and I walk in together he raised his eyebrows. I decided to ignore him, "Guys this is Logan" they all started to greet him, he started looking nervous. "Logan this is Lucy" I stated pointing a girl dressed in all black with red streaks in her hair. "That's Dak" I motioned toward a guy a little taller than Logan with hazel eyes and light brown hair. "obviously you already know Carlos and James, well then that only leaves Camille and jo but it looks like they aren't here yet" just as I said that sentence the doors opened to reveal a perky blonde girl with brown eyes and a curly brown haired girl laughing, "that Jo" I said motioning to the blonde "and that's Camille" I motioned towards the brunette.

Jo walked over to me smiling and pecked me on the cheek I noticed the smile instantly leave Logan's face when Jo did that. "Jo, Camille this is Logan he's new here be nice" i said mostly to Jo considering she a bitch to all of my friends. She completely ignored him, well Camille said a quick hi then went and sat in Dak's lap. "Morning Cami" he said sweetly. Dak and Camille have been dating for around 3 years. Jo left to go sit with her cheerleading friends. "So Logan, lemme see your schedule" I stated, he grabbed his bag and searched through it until bring out a yellow piece of paper. I grabbed mine out of my bag and compared it. As I went through the classes my smile got wider and wider, "wow we have 6 classes together" I stated smiling widely. Yea this was going to be a good year I thought to myself excitedly. He smiled widely as well, we locked eyes and neither of us could look away the butterflies in my stomach were going crazy. The bell suddenly rang signally it was time to get to class broke us out of our daze. I looked away blushing as did he. I stood up extending a hand to him muttering a "let's get to class".

Our first class AP world history went by so fast. Next thing I knew I was in drama my fourth period with James and Cami. "So lover boy, how's your boyfriend?" James teased. I instantly tensed "shut up, Cami could hear you" I hissed. I loved Cami but that girl couldn't keep a secret to save her life. "You know I'm only joking" James muttered quietly not wanting to get Kendall mad. "Well knock it off now!" Kendall exclaimed, "Mr. Diamond, Mr. Knight is there something you'd like to share with the class?" Ms. Wainwright questioned. "No mam" James and I said together. She turned back to the board and resumed teaching.

Luckily everyone had the same lunch. I sat down at my table waiting for everyone to arrive I saw Logan walk through the door and waved him over, he smiled at me before sitting down next to me. "I'm so happy you have this lunch" Logan said then realized what he said and blushed. Boy was he adorable when he blushed. "Same" I admitted making him feel better. "How are you liking it here Mitchell?" I asked. " it's pretty cool I guess but I hate the classes I don't have with you" he mumbled the end probably hoping I would hear what he said but I did and my smile got impossibly wider when he blushed harder than before. Logan and I talked throughout the whole lunch in our own little word, both of us occasionally blushing.

_Maybe I could come out I thought to myself well walking to fifth period…maybe just maybe._

**AN: Kogan moments ;) if you haven't already noticed I hate Jo. I was thinking that the next chapter might have some drama? I don't know yet. Please review telling what you like. Never forget to pm or review I appreciate it all and I guarantee shout out and replies. Lots of love **

**XOXO**

**-Sky**


	4. wanna hang out?

**AN: I want to thank everyone who is reading and reviewing. Special thanks to Logan! I fucking love you to! I would also like to thank one of my best buddies Jackie, for reading this and encouraging (along with a lot of others) to continue writing this so thank you all! I'm SO SORRY for not updating sooner. It's just I was in a car accident and then I was in a play with 5 hour rehearsal…so I just want to say sorry!**

**Disclaimer: *sigh* I don't own big time rush… I only own the plot. Without further ado here is the fourth chapter to neighbors?**

"Want a ride" I asked Logan as we left our last class of the day. He smiled well nodding "sure, thanks knight". Okay normally I hate when people call me by my last name but when it's Logan I couldn't help but smile. "I think I love it here" I heard Logan mumble well getting into the car, I could help the giant grin that spread across my face when he said that. He turned to me blushing when he noticed that I was staring at him.

"So Logan what was your favorite class?" I questioned "hmm, probably government" he said smiling. That one sentence made me smile because government was the one class that we sat next to each other in "What's your favorite class?" he asked me breaking me out of my thoughts." I'd say government as well" I said well sneaking a glance at him. I pulled up to my driveway, slowly getting out of my car not wanting to have to leave Logan.

"Do you want to hang out?" Logan asked me, I nodded excited to be hanging out with Logan more "thanks both my parents are out of town and I really don't want to be alone" he said quietly. "Wow they're out of town already didn't you guys just get here?" I asked without thinking , "uh yea they work a lot" Logan whispered well looking down, "do you mind if I run and tell Katie were I'm going?" he nodded "no its fine, do you mind if I go with you?" I nodded and lead him into my house. "Katie-bug" I yelled as soon as I entered the house "up here" I heard Katie yell from her room. "Why don't you take a seat well I go find Katie" I stated well pointing to the couch. He awkwardly sat well I walked up the stairs. Stopping in front of the room directly across from mine. "Katie-bug?" I said knocking "come in" she said. "why is Logan here?" she questioned immediately, "How'd you know?" I asked curiously "never mind that now why is Logan here?" she asked again. "He's here because I'm going to his house since his parents are out of town" I confessed "oh okay" she said confused then started smirking, I decided it was time for me to leave I waved to her and turned towards the door. As I opened the door Katie yelled "use protection big brother" I turned to glare at her as she pushed me out of her room slamming the door in my face.

I walked down stairs to a blushing Logan, dammit Katie." hey you ready to go?" he questioned shyly. Score he still wants to hang out, I blushed realizing that I never answered him, I nodded and smiled. He got up then led the way to his house, his house was simple not a lot of colors but nice. "Why don't we go up to my room?" I nodded excitedly, calm down I yelled in my head don't freak him out.

**AN: I'm so sorry for such a short chapter but I really wanted to put something out and It was a perfect place to end with a cliffhanger please don't hate me… lots of love **

**XOXO**

**-Sky**


	5. Sleepover

**An: I wanted to update ASAP because it took me so long to update last time and I really hated making you all wait. So I have two announcements! One- I'm writing another story! It's a kogan love story called knight in shining armor it will be posted shortly after this. I would majorly appreciate it if you took some time to read and maybe review? That would make my week. Second- I'm adopting a story called love will find a way, so I will be updating that as well hopefully soon. Like always I would like to thank everyone who has review, followed or favorited this story! I enjoy reading every review you write, it lets me know if I'm doing well. Okay enough with my mini rant. Why don't we get on to the fifth chapter of neighbors?**

**Disclaimer: Do you really think that if I owned big time rushed id spend my time writing about them... Hell no!**

As we made our way up the stairs I got more anxious, which truthfully was really … stupid, I mean how long have I known this guy. What two day? Max, what do I thinks gonna happen when we go up to the room? I know what I think I think that Mr. Logan Mitchell is going to corner me as soon as we get into the room and confess that he is already madly in love with me… yeah right. I realized we stopped, and then I noticed the different surrounding. I was in my crushes room. His walls we painted black and red, he had hockey posters on his wall? Ahh could he be more perfect. I noticed a shelf filled with over a dozen trophies all for something academic like winning a national science fair or having the highest GPA in his whole school. He is…brilliant. I looked over to a blushing Logan, god was could he be any more adorable, then it happened he bit his lip. Okay he was officially more adorable.

"I see you found my nerd shelf" he said bitterly, "You're amazing Logan" I replied still looking at all the trophies. My eyes widen when I realized what I just said and turned to look at a shocked Logan "what?" I questioned nervously. "No one has ever said that to me" he replied still shocked, "you've got to be kidding me, your parents have to be proud" I commented without thinking. He got that sad look again; he looked like a lost puppy. "They're not" was all he said before trying to change the subject "so what's there to do for fun in this town?" he asked. I took a minute to think "um there's a skate park like a mile north from here" I said, his eyes instantly lit up "You skate?" he asked excitedly I nodded "so do I, we should totally check it out sometime" Logan exclaimed. We talked for hours, constantly finding out we had something in common, somehow I got roped into showing Logan around town not that I minded thou. After talking for a little while longer I realized Katie was still home alone and I needed to make her dinner because mom worked the night shift.

"Logan, I have to go" I said getting up. Logan nodded but looked like a kicked puppy that's when it hit me Logan was gonna be alone all night to "hey why don't you come have dinner with Katie and I and maybe you can spend the night so we both don't have to be alone?" I suggested. He nodded happily before starting to pack a bag for tonight and school tomorrow. We then started making our way over to my house. "Katie-bug" I yelled as soon as I opened the door "Kendall" I heard my younger sister reply happily. "Yea why don't you come down here?" we heard some movement and then light footsteps running down the stairs. "Hey Logan" she said addressing the awkward male, before turning to me questioningly. "He's staying with us tonight okay?" she nodded before saying "what's for dinner? I'm starving" I chuckled before moving to the kitchen to find something to make, Logan and Katie following closely behind me. "How's chicken I said poking my head out of the fridge" Logan nodded. "And Katie why don't I make you mac and cheese?" I suggested, she nodded happy that I remember she was vegetarian. We ate, carried on a small conversation, then went and watched TV until I realized both Katie and Logan we asleep. I got up careful to not wake either of them up then gathered Katie in my arms and carried her up to her room. Kissing her on the forehead as I leave the room.

I walk back down stairs to find a confused looking Logan. "Where'd you go?" he asked sleepily "I just took Katie to bed, come on we should get to bed to" he nodded before standing up and following me up to my room. Once we got there he just stood there in the middle of my room rubbing his eyes. "Go on get in the bed" Logan shock his had "I'm fine sleeping on the floor" he said. I quickly said "you're a guest you get the bed. Now go to sleep" he finally nodded and fell asleep a soon as he hit the bed. I laid on the floor thinking.

Sometimes I wonder if I should keep a diary, but then I think wow that was a super gay thought…truth is I REALLY want to have a diary. Want to know why? I betcha do, the main reason is to write about my stupid school girl crush on my neighbor. I could feel so many pages just with describing how beautiful his little button nose is. Is it bad that I'm starting to annoy myself? It because all I think about is the beautiful creature named Logan Mitchell. There's another reason I want a diary, I want a diary so I could rant to myself about coming out. I mean maybe I could convince myself before I get creepier, I kind of feel like a weirdo I mean I literally spend almost every minute of every day thinking about my new friend.

Who knows what time I actually fell asleep? But I do know the last thing I thought about before finally letting sleep take me over.

_I thought about kissing Logan Mitchell…_

**An: I hope you all enjoyed the fifth chapter of Neighbors? I will update ASAP. Please check out my other story knight in shining armor. Also please r&amp;r, I appreciate it so much. Lots of love **

**-sky**


	6. I'm Logan Mitchell and

**AN: So I decided to change it up a little bit. Again I'm so sorry for making all of you wait I want to thank everyone who has read and reviewed this. I love you all! So I just wanted to clarify that this is in Logan's POV.**

**Disclaimer don't own Big time rush**

I heard a beeping alarm; I opened my eyes well groaning. I got up and stretched before walking over to the alarm and hitting the button to shut it up. Only then did I realize the amazing smell wafting through the room. I turned and looked over to an empty bed. Where was Kendall? I made my way down stairs, and was overwhelmed with an amazing smell. "Hey, sleepy head" Kendall said as soon as he saw me," Hi" was all I said as I wiped the sleep out of my eyes. He smiled "you should probably get dressed, so Katie doesn't see you like that" he said them gestured to my practically naked Body. I blushed them ran up the stairs, I completely forgot I was only wearing boxers.

I ran back downstairs to a blushing Kendall and a smug Katie; I choose to ignore whatever happened well I was changing. "Morning Katie" I said "morning Kendall" I said before sitting next to him "morning Logan" "so what were you two talking about" the only response I got was a lot of stuttering from Kendall and laughing from Katie. Katie finally said "that for us to know and no one to find out" That sentence made me wonder what the knight siblings were up to." When do your parents get back" Kendall mumbled obviously trying to change the subject. I frowned at the mention of my parents that abandon me every 1 to 2 months for weeks. "My mom will be gone until Thursday and my dad won't be back until Next Monday and the Tuesday after that my mom is leaving again to go to New York" I tried to hide the pain and bitterness but I did a horrible job at it. "Wow, and I thought my mom was never around" Katie said resulting in Kendall sending her upstairs to get ready for school. "Sorry about her she has no filter" Kendall apologized as soon as Katie left the room. "Don't worry about it" I mumbled before getting up and heading toward Kendall's room to get ready for school.

Katie apologizes to me in the car on the ride to her school. I simply nodded well saying don't worry about it I'm not mad. Thing is I truly mean it but the knights can't tell that I do so they continue to apologize to the point of annoying. Kendall and I walked into the cafeteria and over to our overcrowded table that all are friends are sitting at. Wow I've never said overcrowded and friends in the same sentence before. I could get use to that I smiled, that smile was quickly replaced with a frown when Jo pulled Kendall away and kissed him, I'll be the first to admit it I was jealous of the "power couple". Most guys my age would be jealous of Kendall because duh he is making out with the head cheerleader not to mention the hottest girl in school. But I'm not like them I'm the one that's jealous of Jo because she's making out with the hockey captain, hottest guy in school, sweetest guy in school and the guy that was the main star in my wet dream( what do you expect? I'm a teenage boy I have hormones!).

To my surprise and May I say pleasure Kendall pulled away from Jo with any angry expression "why the fuck do I smell Jett's cologne?" Jo just started stuttering "how long" Kendall asked with a hint of disbelief in his voice. When Jo didn't say anything let alone look at Kendall he yelled "HOW LONG" " 3 months" Jo muttered, James Carlos and I stepped in and dragged Kendall out of the cafeteria before he could make a bigger scene. "Are you okay?" I asked trying to hide the happiness out of my voice. Damn it Logan! I thought to myself, he's straight and even if he wasn't he wouldn't want a used up piece of trash like you! Tears started to well up in my eyes. I couldn't think of that horrible day or that horrible man. I am my worst enemy.

"Logan what's wrong?" I heard Kendall say I didn't respond I couldn't. So I did the only thing that came to mind, I ran, running was the one thing I was good at. I ran to the boys bathroom full on sobbing, my body shaking as I slid down the wall. I couldn't handle this by myself but who do I have to turn to? My parents are out of town and don't care, why would they? I couldn't talk to Kendall so I just sat there ignoring the pleading call coming from my friends, ignoring the bell ringing signaling I was late to 1st,2nd,3rd and 4th period because I didn't care... Just like everyone in my life. I just didn't care. I finally decided to move when the bell signally lunch rung I made my way out if school without anyone noticing, the school wasn't far from my house so I just walked. As I was walking I couldn't help thinking of that horrible night.

The night that changed my life forever, the night that made my parents works more. It was a party my friend sandy dragged me to, one of her college friends was throwing it so we lied to our parents for once I decided to be disobedient and I wish more than anything that I hadn't been. So it was about midnight when I went in search of a bathroom. The first one I stumbled upon had a couple fucking in it so I walked into an abandoned bed room. Thing was it wasn't as abandoned as I thought. There was a college boy in the bathroom. He was a college boy I could never forget. That night I was raped. And for the next eight months I was in an abusive relationship with the same boy who raped me.

_I'm Logan Mitchell and I'm a rape victim... _


	7. Let me in

**As you might have guessed this is back to Kendall's P.O.V and it starts early in the morning, so like in the middle if the last chapter.**

**Disclaimer: I don't own big time rush...**

I walked into the cafeteria was immediately greeted by my girlfriend Jo. Which was strange I think she might actually be jealous of Logan, I mean we try to kiss as least as possible (for my benefit of course). This time there was something different yet similar about Jo. Was of her perfume? No wait I know that smell it's Jett's colonel that bitch puts way too much on after hockey practice. I pulled away from Jo my anger obviously showing on my face, how she could do this to me. No I wasn't mad because she broke my heart I was mad because she just made it so much harder to resist Logan.

"Why the fuck do I smell Jett's cologne?" I hissed. When she only stuttered I knew I was right. "How long" I asked still not believing she would cheat on me. When she didn't answer I decided to try a different route "HOW LONG" I screamed in her face. I didn't expect her to say "3 months" how could I be so stupid and not notice before I knew it my friends were pulling me out of the cafeteria. Ha I bet they thought I was gonna bitch slap Jo...well she'd deserve it if I did. I mean I'm gay does it really count? "Are you okay?" I heard a sweet shy voice ask but something confused me about thirty seconds after he asked if I was okay his eyes started to fill with tears.

"Logan what's wrong?" I asked but never got a response, instead Logan took off running, and I was shocked for a second before I started to run after him. "Logan" I said as I banged on the bathroom door "please let me in" I pleaded I could hear him sobbing and it broke my heart. "Logan please" I whispered before sliding down the door. I stayed at the door until third period when a teacher caught me. I didn't focus in third or fourth period, how could I I have no idea why Logan's crying but I want to make it stop.

When lunch came I tried to run out the door as fast as possible but Mr. Griffin had other plans "Mr. Knight? Can I have a word with you?" I stopped and frowned in the door way before turning around and shuffling over to my economics teachers desk "what is it Mr. Griffin?" I asked trying to get out of here as fast as possible "why weren't you paying attention? Was it about what happened with Jo?" He asked obviously trying to be somewhat compassionate. I decided to lie to get out of he as fast as possible. " yes it was but I promise it won't happen again" " okay, you are excused Mr. Knight" I nodded and jumped up once out of the class I began to ran to the boys bathroom but when I got there Logan was gone.

"Kendall" I heard a whiney voice say, I turned around and saw Jo standing there looking fake guilty I could see through all her lies. "What Jo" I snapped shocking her, her shock then turned to anger "that's no way to talk to your girlfriend now is it Kendall?" She snarled right back popping her hip to add attitude. "No one is taking to their girlfriend Jo, at least I sure as hell am not" the shocked look returned only to turn into vengeful. "I know a secret you wouldn't want to spread around the school" she whispered a knowing look in her eyes. "Fuck it, we will talk about this later I have to find Logan, so if you wouldn't mind moving you slutty ass" I said before moving past her, she grabbed my arm before whining "you are seriously choosing that nerd over me again?", "why wouldn't I, I enjoy his company and that's more than I could say about you" I said her eyes bulging slightly out of her slutty little head. "I'd be nicer if I were you" she warned, "Fuck it and fuck you Jo, no one is going to believe a cheating whore like you anyways" I snarled before pulling my arm away and heading to the front of the school. I stopped and thought for spittle bit trying to figure out where Logan would be.

Where could he be? Think Kendall think! Maybe he went home? I would if something bad happened. I decided to skip the rest of the day and head to Logan's house. On the drive there I could help but overthink why Logan started crying. Maybe something bad happened to his parents? Or maybe they were coming home later? Before I knew it was at Logan's house I pulled into the driveway, I practically ran from my car. I tried the door knob and to my surprise and fear the door was unlocked, calm down he's fine. "Logan?" I yelled out but no response I decided to walk up to his room maybe he's in there...

"Logan" I yelled again but this time I heard I slight whimper. I opened Logan's door and was shocked when I saw Logan tear stained cheeks, blood shot eyes and heaving chest curled up in a ball crying on his bed. "Logie" I said trying being comforting, he raised his head his eyes wide "what are you doing here?" His voice laced with shock. "I wanted to make sure you were okay" I wait before adding "I was really worried about you". I thought that what I said might quiet down his crying but it did the exact opposite he started to wail into his knees. " Logan, let me in" I said well moving closer to him, I started to rub his back thinking it'd be comforting but he flinched away. "GET AWAY FROM ME CONNOR" he screamed Connor? Who's Connor and why is he so scared? "Logan it's me Kendall" I said met with only silence "Logan look at me, what's going on?" He whimpered before raising his head "I don't want you to think differently of me" he said barely a whisper "nothing you say can change how I think of you" because I think I love you I thought. "k-Kendall" "I'm right here, you can tell me anything" I stated trying to encourage him "what do you want to know?" I thought for a second before remember something he said earlier.

_"Who's Connor?"_


	8. Revealing something

**This is dedicated to Victoria! I love all of you who read this so very much I'm sorry I'm so bad at updating I just started lit role playing and it's so addicting! So this is in both of their P.O.V. Without further ado let's find out about Connor!**

I sniffled, I really didn't want to tell Kendall about Connor but I will because damn it I need someone to be by me in my life. "Connor was the exact opposite of me" I started clearing my throat and continuing when Kendall nodded for me to continue. "He was a junior in college and I was a junior in high school, he was captain of the football team I was the king of the nerds..." I stumbled before finally saying "he was a rapist and I wasn't" Kendall gasped but I continued not knowing of I'd ever have enough courage again. "He was abusive and I couldn't hurt a fly"

Again Kendall gasped and hugged me; I turned and let the tears flow for the first time since Connor was arrested. I bawled into his chest for a good 15 minutes before calming down slightly. "How long?" I heard a shy voice ask. "How long what?" I asked genuinely confused, "how long were you abused?" He asked even quieter then the former question. "Eight months" I muttered softly "you poor thing" I heard him mumble as he stroked my hair. After a little bit of silence I started to feel him shaking "are you okay?" When he didn't look at me I knew something was wrong maybe he hates me now. "Kendall look at me" I did not expect what I saw Kendall knight was crying literally bawling his eyes out. "Why are you crying" I asked completely baffled he sniffled before saying "I just can't believe someone did that to you...you're just so amazing" he said making me blush, I hugged him tighter well repeatedly mumbling thank your into his chest.

"Kendall" I mumbled before pulling away from his, he hummed in response urging me to continue. "Please don't tell anyone" I practically whispered "I won't I promise" he mumbled into my hair before kissing it, making me blush. "Let's go to my house" he said after 10 minutes of sniffing and silence, I nodded reluctant to leave his hold wondering if I'll ever be that close to him again. He stood up and started walking once we were in the living room walking side by side he threw his arm around my shoulders. It made me smile and lean in a little closer as we walked across the street, he looked down at me smiling when he realized I was smiling.

I noticed that he seemed like… he was debating with himself. He furrowed his brows and bit his lip well we were walking to his house and honestly he looked adorable. I know I shouldn't be thinking this about the boy next door but there is something about him that feels; I pause trying to find the right word, safe. _I really need safe in my life…_

Kendall's P.O.V:

I can't believe everything Logan's been through, he's so strong I wish I could have protected from that Connor asshole. My poor baby…. Damn it I did it again he isn't mine, I bet he's not even gay I mean how could you be attracted to a guy after getting raped and abused by one. I really do think I'm in love with him I mean how could you not be he's so strong and sweet, not to mention very easy on the eyes. "Are you gonna unlock the door?" I heard him say, only then did I realize we were just standing in front of my door. "Ugh yeah sorry" I fumble awkwardly with the keys before finding the right one and unlocking the door for us. We walked in and turned on the TV but I couldn't focus all I could think about was what Logan told me. Why did he tell me? Do I really matter that much to him? Should I tell him something back? Ugh I can't think clearly! I exclaim in my head, okay I really need to stop talking to myself. You know what I'm the only one who understands so fuck it! Okay me think, should I tell him about my love…for him? Definitely not! How about my dad… not many people know the story behind him hmm that's a good one! I give myself a mental high five.

"Logan? Can in tell you something not a lot of people know about me?" I manage to say obviously confusing Logan with my sudden confession. "Please promise you won't tell anyone?" I hold out my pinky making him chuckle before he grabs it with his uttering a quick "I swear" l my gulps then start stuttering before saying something I never in a million years would come out of my mouth. This is not what I planned on telling him brain!

"_I-I'm... G-G-Gay"_

**AN: Hi guys! I'm so sorry for the last two chapters being so short I hope you like that he finally told Logan one of his many secrets. I was wondering do you guys want to know what happen to his dad or nah? As always thanks for everything, please review and answer is ya want to know! Much love- Sky XX**


	9. You're what?

**Logan P.O.V**

"You're what?" I ask completely shocked, the Kendall Knight is gay? This can't be true. Maybe I just heard him wrong, I turn back to look at Kendall. I notice his sad demeanor, his slumped shoulders and his head hung low. "Kendall?" I ask quietly causing him to wince "Please don't make me repeat it." is all he responded with never looking up at me."why did you tell me this?" I look at the side of his face, him never looking up as he shrugs. " I felt like it was only fair. I actually didn't plan on saying that. I was gonna tell you about my dad. I guess I just couldn't hold it in any longer" Stupid little curious me. I think as soon as he mentions his dad. I've always wondered what happened to his dad. He looks at me a sighs" what?" I ask confused. "You look curious. Why?" I try to think of a valid excuse. I curse myself for caving under pressure and just admit the real reason. " I'm curious about your dad" he looks down making me wonder if I've crossed the line. " Sorry, stupid little curious me doesn't know boundaries. You really don't have to tell me" I mutter after a few minutes have passed in silence. " My dad was a horrible man" Kendall finally says shocking me. " Wait was? Is he dead?" Kendall lean back against the couch. " To me." I nod even though he can't see me " You do" he cut me off by saying " He taught me that liking boys was wrong. He used to say that boys who liked boys disgusted him. I knew I was gay since eighth grade so everything he'd say would effect me. One day when he found something on my laptop" I look at him confused. " He found a gay porn site in my web history. That's the day the abuse started" I look at him and realized he was crying. I lean over pulling him into a hug and letting him cry into my neck. " I-I can relate-e loga-an" he said through tears, I sigh and rub his back In hopes of calming him down. " Kendall, can I tell you something?" I ask and immediately feel him nod against my neck. I move so my mouth is next to his ear as I whisper " I'm gay too don't ever feel ashamed for being who you are because you are amazing too"

**Kendall's P.O.V.**

"Never be ashamed?!" I look up surprised not letting my brain process the fact that I actually have a chance with the boy next door."You're perfect just the way you are Kendall, no matter what anyone else says." I knew that he was referencing the fact that my dad was, correction is, a homophobe. "T-thank you" I say hiccupping in between words. Logan simply nods pulling me into a hug. " Thank you too"

**Logan P.O.V**

"Thank you too" I muttered into Kendall's hair. I knew he'd never know the real reason I was thanking him for. That reason being the fact that he made me feel again, after Connor. I never thought that I would let someone into my heart, but I did. I'm lucky enough to have let Kendall Knight the boy next door into my heart.

**The next day: Kendall's P.O.V.**

I walk into school trying my best to avoid Jo Taylor. I walk to my locker a gasp escaping my lips when I see the most hurtful word written all over my locker. The word, fag, was everywhere. I knew who did it from their girly handwriting, I stomp over to her locker coming face to face with a smirking Jo Taylor. " What the hell Jo?" she raises and eyebrow and leans in as to whisper something but last minute turns her head smashing our lips together." Kendall, baby, I have a solution for your problem. We stay together and you forget about Logan and I don't tell anyone."

**AN: I know and I'm sorry please don't kill me. I haven't updated in forever and the latest ones have been so short. here is another short one. Of course I have to leave you at another cliffhanger. XOXO**

**-Sky**


	10. I don't want to

Forget about Logan? That's impossible, he's the only one I've ever loved. " I-I can't" I stutter out. Jo gives me an evil smirk before leaning close to whisper "Then get ready for hell, you fag." she walks away to her group of girls and begins speaking loud enough for me to hear, " Sooo. I broke up with Kendall. Want to know why?" They nod intrigued. " Because he's a fag" They gasp then giggle all spreading out to go deliver the news that Mr. Popular is gay. I frown walking over to Jo pulling her away from what's left of her group of friends. " Alright deal. Now go tell them you were joking" I hate the looks I was getting after whispering girls made their way to some of my team mates and friends. all I can say is that I am a coward. I just wish I could tell Logan that he did nothing wrong and this has nothing to really do about him except the fact that Jo is a jealous bitch.

(Hours later: Logan's P.O.V)

Something strange is going on. All day Kendall's been ignoring me. In the classes we have together he no longer sits next to me and at lunch he sat at the opposite side of the table with Jo in his lap. I didn't get how they could breathe never seperating the mouths for longer than a minute. it's so disgusting. It's now our last class and were forced to be partners. He won't even look at me. "Kendall? whats wrong?" he ignores my question acting as if I don't exist. I almost felt like crying. I told him my two biggest secrets and the next fucking day he's acting like I'm not here.I sniffle wiping the tears forming in my eyes when he looks up, wincing when our eyes lock. He quickly looks down again. That's when I lose it. I get up walking out of the room crying.

**Kendall's P.O.V **

I heard it... The sound I never wanted to hear again. Logan crying. I feel like the worst person to ever live. I find myself standing in an attempt to go follow him until my brain clears and I remember the deal. I look around the class to see if any of Jo's monkeys are in the class. I see the Jennifers watching me closely. I sit back down sighing. Maybe I could write Logan a note.

(The note kendall writes to Logan)

_Logan. I'm sorry I have to say this over note. I'm not going to be able to see, talk, or hang out with you anymore. This has nothing to do with you. It's my problems I need to deal with. I'm so sorry. You will be in my thoughts. sincerely Kk_

( back to kendall P.O.V)

I decided not to include Jo just in case she some how finds out. I frown thinking that this is the last time I will have any sort of communication with the boy I love. My frown deepens when I realized I will not be able to be the one that delivers the note. I need someone I trust to give it to Logan, I think as I pack up my stuff ready to get out of school. At the end of class, I see James in the hallway waiting for Carlos. "Hey James, can you give this to Logan the next time you see him?" I hand him the note before walking away. In the car I let all my stress and pain and anger out. I bang on the steering wheel as tears stream down my face. This isn't how it should go! I should admit i'm gay and not care what others think. All that matters is Logan. I finally look up muttering " All that matters is Logan" before I hear the sounds of crunching metal and breaking bones. then everything just went black.

_" Where is my son!?" Mrs. knight asked the lady at the hospital desk with a crying Katie in her arms._

**AN: So you guys are going to hate me... the next few chapters are going to be very hateful, and depressing.**


	11. Don't Let me lose you

**AN: there is a lot of P.O.V changes. **

**Logan's P.O.V **

I was walking home and I saw it. I heard it. The sound of crunching metal and breaking bones the truck flipping. I saw it and I heard it and I wish I hadn't. It didn't register in my mind right away that I knew that truck. That I knew the driver of that truck. Driver of that truck that made my heart beat faster. I didn't want to think about the driver of that truck so I called 911 and I left I didn't want to see or hear what happened to the truck driver.  
I couldn't let it go. I knew it was Kendall and I knew he was hurt. Instead of going to my house right away I walked to his and saw Katie and Mrs. Knight they're obviously waiting for Kendall. I told them what I saw and they started crying. it wasn't until I left the house that I realized I was crying just as much as them. I love this boy and there  
was a chance something seriously wrong happened. I don't know if he's still alive. I don't know what would happen if he wasn't alive. All I want to know is how this happened.

**Katie's P.O.V **

Mom and I got to the hospital both of us bawling our eyes out. " Where is my son!" My mom practically yells at the lady sitting at the front desk. So there's something you guys should know why my moms reacting this horrible when she was younger her father got into a car accident him and her mom and her were in the car and her mom and her dad died. She felt responsible because she thought she was distracting. And plus that's her son what do you expect!

**Logan's point of view **  
you know that feeling where you just want to go back in time and stop any bad things from happening. It was exactly how Logan felt. He wanted to scream to cry to yell Kendall's name when he saw that he was in the wrong lane. He wanted to run out and wave his arms crazily trying to stop that semi from hitting Kendalls truck but it's not possible it's not possible to go back and stop anything you didn't like. All you want is to save the ones you love. And sometimes that's just not possible. If only I knew this would've happened...

**Kendall's point of view **  
I woke up with blinding lights in my face and pain everywhere. The thing is I don't think I actually woke up it wasn't like an awakening like I could feel myself start breathing. I turn and I see myself lying there thrown from the car. Those blinding lights being lights of my truck where I flew out of one paramedic sitting on my lap pumping my chest with a tube in my mouth trying to make me breathe. I'm not breathing. Why am I here why am I not in my body why is this happening to me. I don't get this. All I want is to be home. My mom and Katie what are they thinking. Do they even know this happen. I don't want to die. I need to be there for them. They don't have anyone else. They need me and I need them.

**Katie's point of view:**  
"Where is my brother?" I ask tears running down my face "I need him where is he " the lady at the front desk stays quiet not knowing either. Just as I'm asking that my wish is granted. I wish it wasn't. Nurses and doctors are screaming "help we need as much help as we can get. " There's the sight of blood and and I know where it's coming from because laying unconscious on that gurney is my brother. He is covered in cuts and bruises and I can see his bones on some of parts of his leg. How could this happen. There's a nurse sitting in his lap pressing on his chest I don't know what that means. I don't know If that means he's not breathing. please don't let me lose him.

**Mama knight's point of view:**  
My son. How could this happen to him. He's broken and bruised and bloody. I hate this. I'm not supposed to be the one seeing my son like this. He's never supposed to look like since. He can't die I can't lose him. Katie can't lose him we can't lose him.

**Logan's P.O.V**  
_I can't lose you. I love you._

**Katie's P.O.V**  
_Big brother stay strong. We need you. _

**Mama knight P.O.V**  
_You can fight this Kendall. For Katie and I. _

**Nurses P.O.V**

_"Doctor we're losing him"_


	12. It'll all get better

**AN: Again there is a lot of character changes.**

**Logan's P.O.V**

My mind was racing. I couldn't stop thinking about him. If he's okay...if he's even alive. I get up and walk out of my house. I had to be there for Mrs. Knight and Katie. I jog to the hospital thanking god for such a close hospital. I walk into the main entrance looking at the floor directory. The ICU is probably my best bet. I try my best to walk as calmly as I can to the elevators. I get in with this crying mother and daughter, they remind me of how Mrs. Knight and Katie reacted when I told them about Kendall. I begin tearing up at the reason I'm here. The daughter obviously younger than Katie turning around when I sniffle.

" What's wrong mister?" She stumbles over her words but not because she was crying because she's probably five or six. "The love of my life got into an a-accident" I stutter over the word accident as I begin crying more. " So did my daddy." the mother of the girl chimes In when she hears me crying. "Ariel, leave this poor boy alone" she nods muttering a " Sorry mister" before turning back around. I think about how calm this little girl reacted well I'm standing here a mess. The elevator doors open breaking me out of my thoughts. I step off receiving a small timid smile from the little girl " It'll get better mister" is the last thing I hear her whisper before the doors shut.

**Katie's P.O.V**

A doctor in scrubs emerges from the room they took my brother into. He passes my mom and I. I cry harder when I notice the blood all over his scrubs. He looks at me with fear in his eyes. I let go of my mothers arm and stop the doctor. " Where's my brother?" I ask my voice calm when he doesn't answer I start asking thousands of questions my tears falling faster. " Is he okay?" he hesitates when I ask that question his face taking on a solemn expression. " Katiebug" I hear someone say. I turn my head and see Logan standing there with bloodshot eyes and a tearstained face. I run to him wrapping my arms around his waist and crying into his chest. " Shh, Katie. It'll all get better." he whisper into my hair before kissing the top of my head.

**Nurse's P.O.V**

This poor boy. One thought circling my mind as I move back to check his vitals. I keep thinking back to his mother's crying and the little girl screaming for her brother well I was giving him chest compressions. Reminded me of how I was when my son... I tear up thinking of the terrible accident that killed my son. I think of how much Kendall resembles her son. She tears up more backing away bumping into the try holding one of the blood bags needed for Kendall's surgery. It falls splattering all over the grimy stained floor of the operation room. The doctors yell as the nurse cries. " That was the last bag of O-Negative blood we had!" One of the nurse exclaims. the nurses more focused on the spilled blood then Kendall's dropping pulse.

**Logan's P.O.V**

Katie's crying could be heard throughout the floor. We get sympathetic looks from almost everyone in the waiting room. I can feel my shirt dampen by every passing minutes. My heart aches that tears are what's soaking my shirt. A nurse with blood splattered scrubs comes running to us. " Do you know your blood type?" She points to a crying Mrs. Knight who in return gives her a confused look but responds with " A-Positive" The nurse frowns then turns to me " U-um" I try my best to think of my blood type " O-Negative" I say 99 percent sure. I guess that's what she wanted to hear because the corners of her mouth quirk into a soft smile. " Would you be willing to donate blood for Kendall?" my eyes widen and I nod quickly. "Yes of course" after hearing this she ushers for me to follow her. I move Katie off my lap and stand walking behind her briskly. We walk into a room with three walls lined with chairs. " Pull your right sleeve up and sit anywhere" she says walking toward a cabinet grabbing supplies needed to draw blood.

**Nurse's P.O.V**

"How is he?" I hear the young man ask in the chair beside me. I hesitate " He's seen better days" I didn't want to scare the boy so I spared him all of the details. " How do you know him? You two don't look related" He looks as if he's having an inner battle on what to reply with. " Well... I-I'm in l-love with him." I turn looking at the boy awing on the inside, " Does he know?" he shakes his head no frowning. " Do you know if he loves you?" I feel bad asking him all these questions. He shakes his head no again as I prick him with the needle hitting a vein with ease. " All I know is that he's gay too" He says in a timid voice not flinching at all as I drain a pint of blood.

**Kendall's P.O.V**

I can't say these lights aren't any brighter than my truck headlights but the are whiter. I am wandering around the hospital not knowing where to go. I walk into a waiting room my face brightening when I see my momma and Katie. They look like they've been crying but why? "Katiebug don't cry, I'm here" She doesn't even flinch as if I'm not speaking to her. She's talking but I can't hear anything she's saying. I see her point to the right of the waiting room by a set of double doors and I see Logan... He's obviously been crying and he has a bandage on his arm. I wonder why.

You know in old movies when there are black hole in the film that flicker in and out? Well that is what's happening to me as I see him walking closer. Everything's blurring and my chest is tightening. I know something's wrong. "Help" I whimper out no one hearing me as I collapse to my knees then falling face first.

_"Doctor!" A nurse screams. _

**An: I know you hate it but I love leaving you guys one cliffhangers. Much love sky.**


	13. The end? Maybe

•Super important authors note•

**A.N. I really need your opinions in the reviews. I'm deciding if I want to make this the last chapter or not. If this Is the last chapter there will be a sequel in a few months. If this isn't I will update faster but the chapters will be shorter. It's your choice, please tell me what you'd like. **

* * *

With my parents always gone and Kendall in the coma, I practically live with the Knight's. It's been a month and I visit him every day, for hours at a time. It's become a ritual, picking Katie up from school and going to the hospital doing our homework in Kendall's room. Around six sometimes 6:30 we would leave and I take Katie home and make dinner. Mrs. Knight working in the same hospital her son almost died in a month earlier and is now in a coma in, has taken it's toll on her. When she works the day shifts and is actually home at night I can hear her crying most of the night. There's been a few nights where I've noticed Katie no longer in her bed and instead in Kendall's bed, gripping his pillow tightly. Sometimes I can hear faint whispers of pleading, begging her brother to come back, other nights I hear her sobs muffled by Kendall's pillow but tonight was different. Instead of Katie crawling into Kendall's bed, she crawled in the mine. Laid her head on my chest, minutes later I felt the tears spilling from her eyes dampening my shirt. I hugged her closer, closing my eyes denying the tears that were fighting to escape. She mutters something between her sobs. "What Katiebug?" I whisper, opening my eyes looking down at her. She stares at me with this pained expression that shatters my already broken heart into even smaller pieces. "It no longer smells like him" It takes me a minute to realize she's talking about Kendall and his pillow. "Logie, is my brother ever gonna wake up?" there is one thought, more like a date, circling round in my mind as I whisper "I don't know" to Katie causing her to whimper then cry harder. You have two months, ken . You better wake up. for Katie, for your mom, for me.

* * *

Weeks passed and I couldn't help but get desperate. With no sign of his condition getting worse or better, everyone was desperate for his survival. The hockey team hasn't won one game this year with Stenson as the captain, the lunch table is now always completely silent. Out of everything Carlos hasn't said a word at school, barely even talking at home or to James. The ball of energy named Carlos now drags his feet and mopes around school, home, the hospital, everywhere. To think its almost Kendall's birthday. His eighteenth birthday. He'd be adult but unless he wakes within three weeks before they "pull the plug" he'll never be 18.

Katie sleeping in my bed is now a ritual. She said she thinks to much when she's alone. I understand that completely, I have a similar problem. Every time I close my eyes I see the accident. The crushed metal and Kendall's jacket hanging from the broken glass still left barely hanging on. The thing that torments me most is the fact that kendall had the jacket on at the end of school. I know that by the end of the truck rolling he was no longer in the car. The thought of him getting thrown from the truck breaks my heart. The fact that he had to be in a Crazy amount of pain. l am praying , begging that Kendall wakes up in time . He has to wake up, he just has to. He can't abandon us. We can't lose him.

* * *

" up. We are going to see kendall"I open my eyes half asleep. I wipe my eyes sleepily , slowly processing her words before sitting up in my bed to find Katie completely ready." why didn't you wake me?" she simply shrugs motioning for me to get up. I stand shooing her out of my room. I walk to my closet,wondering what to wear. I know it's stupid worrying about what to wear when you're going to see someone in a coma.

I got ready smelling my usual breakfast cooking. Toast. I walk out in my navy blue sweater vest and black jeans longing to see those emerald green eyes greet me in the kitchen like they did oh so long ago. I gasp when I glance at the calender and see that today is the 30th of October. Two days. I don't want the first of November to ever arrive. That's the day I have to say goodbye forever. I've never been very good with goodbyes so I simply tell myself that he's going to wake up and I'm not going to have to say goodbye. He's going to wake up. He just has too.

Katie walks into the kitchen and I quickly wipe my tears away not wanting to alert Katie. " I have a good feeling about today" she whispers into my chest as she hugs me. I stay quiet not wanting to bring Katie down. "I know we only have two days but my brothers strong " I nod, kissing the top of her head. " I know he is"

We get to the hospital going straight to Kendall's room having already memorized his room number from the frequent visits. It's almost as if the whole world was hushed, as if everyone knew he most likely only has two more days to live. I hate the thought of it but it becoming more and more likely as the days pass. There is no doubt in my mind that kendall knight's a fighter but sometimes even the strongest people don't make it. Kendall knight, the boy who stole my heart and is now fighting for his life. I feel like my life suddenly turned into one of this dramatic movies, where my life is now sleepless night and nonstop crying over the boy I love.

We step Into his room catching gripping Kendall's hands with her head down resting on the bed. You can hear her ragged breath indicating the sobs we can't see. "Momma" Katie says softly well walking towards her mother. Mrs. Knight jumps quickly wiping her tears from her face. The pain obvious on her face with the bloodshot eyes.

"Katie" she whispers opening her arms for the smaller girl. Katie runs the rest of the way to her mom. She climbs into her lap holding her mother closely. I walk over to the girls placing my hand on top of Katie's hand which is gripping her mother's and brother's intertwined hands.

It's been awhile since all three if us have been able to visit home together. The mechanical beeps made it hard to think, I hear a small sigh and wonder which one of the girls it was. The pile of hands twitch and the girls look at me. " Are you okay?" Katie's mumbles half her face still slightly hidden in her mother's chest. " I'm as goo..." I go silent when I hear a soft groan. The same beeps I hate started to make my heart race as the beat quickens.

I stand and move to the front or the bed by Kendall's head. I stroke the still soft dirty blonde hair leaning down planting a gentle kiss on his forehead. I let my lips linger before pulling back keeping my eyes shut. I sigh softly before opening my eyes. I gasp when I see something I've been waiting to see for the past months. Beautiful, bright, shining, perfect emerald eyes. I cover my mouth taking in a sharp breath not believing it. "Mrs. Knight! Katie!" I gesture for them to look before running to the nurses station. I found the nurse from before, who took my blood. We jog back to his room and she takes a moment to collect herself before, easing the tube from his mouth.

Kendall chokes softly motioning for water. I grab the styrofoam cup pouring the slightly chilled water into it before handing it to him. He takes small sips slowly taking in his surroundings. A few days pass and Kendall's been completely silent, something in his eyes shows me that he's dying to say something. We celebrated his birthday as best we could in a small hospital room. A small group, candles, and singing. He smiled. Two days later, four days after he's woke up, we're here, staring at each other. Kendall whimpers softly before muttering something under his breath. My eyes widen when I realize he said something. "What Kenny?" he shakes his head frowning softly. "Please, tell me" It's almost as if you could cut the awkwardness with a knife as I wait for him to decide if he wants to tell me or not. It feels like hours pass as I wait but I know it hasn't been because I've been staring at the clock behind Kendall's head. Three minutes have passed when he finally speaks.

_"I love you Logan Mitchell"_


	14. Part Two

**Part Two**

Here's the second part of neighbors, it's being posted here and in the story titled I'm in love with the boy next door?

Please rate and review.

strongMuch love. Sky


	15. Sequel

I stand, a huge smile on my face. I walk over to his bed cupping his cheek as I plant my lips softly on his before pulling away.

Kendall stands quickly making his way towards me, this dazed look occupying his eyes as he approached me. I move towards him, bringing my hand up to rest where his shoulder should be "log.." the choked sound of my names catches my attention as well as the loud sound on someone _slamming_ into something else. I take in a sharp breath as I look at Kendall's unconscious body laying on the floor by my feet. I yell at the top of my lungs for a doctor, for a nurse, for _anyone_. I drop to my knees gripping his wrist looking for a pulse as I wait for the doctor. I can feel the tears flooding from my eyes. I'm suddenly pushed away the electric buzz of life coming from the pads pressed against his chest.

"I love you too" I whisper as I'm ushered out of the room well doctors practically chant "stay with me" in hushed tones to keep me calm. How can I be fucking calm?! He tells me he loves me then passes out! I did this, it's my fault. Oh god. My kiss killed him. What if he doesn't wake up? Katie's going to hate me...

* * *

I wish I could've noticed the ragged breathing or the hand gripping his own chest. If only I could've paid attention or caught him as he was falling, we wouldn't be here

* * *

Logan Mitchell. The failure. The screw-up. The killer.

Okay so maybe killers a little over exaggerated but if Kendall dies it technically is my fault. Okay. I couldn't help those thoughts running through my mind, as I sit by Kendall's door, knees against my chest, chin tucked between them, tears slowly slipping from my eyes. I blame myself, I know everyone else blames me as well. The doctor told me he was awake... an hour ago but I'm scared, what if he hates me. I stand for about a minute the pins and needles fading from my foot slowly. I turn and rest my hand on the hospital door, glancing through the window, my heart flutters when I see him smile.

I open the door. closing it silently behind me. He turns to me with wide eyes "Who are you? Why are you in my room? Are you allowed to be in here?" He flooded my mind with questions "Kendall, quit joking around. I'm so sorry I kissed you" his face shifts to disgust for a second before back to confusion. "I don't know, who you are but I do know that I am not gay" his eyes are hard, hiding his true feelings like before, his jaw tightens as I stare into his eyes searching for anything.

Kendall watches me closely as I walk to the end of the bed grabbing the clipboard. I skim through the diagnosis, heart attack, I knew that. I keep reading the words _echoing_ through my mind "Memory loss" I say under my breath. I look back up into his eyes as I start to process what I just read. He's guarded like before I met him

Only then did I realize Kendall was emitting small painful noises. He closes his eyes tears appearing in them when they open. "You d-didn't answer any of my questions" he sniffles and stutters. I don't know what to say "Um... I'm one of your best friends and... the love of your life" I mumble the second part secretly hoping he hears me. I notice his face softens for a moment before locking away his emotions again. He stares into my eyes and I muster up all my feelings for him. His eyes soften "You love me..." I nod, my eyes filling with tears "I think you should go" My tears finally fall when I'm walking to the door.

_He doesn't remember me..._

Kendall's P.O.V.

How could I feel this way about someone I don't even know? To see the tears in his eyes nearly killed me. The look of pleading me to remember "Hey, wait." He stops. "Tell me your name" He clears his throat sitting at the end of my bed carefully. "Hortense Logan Mitchell, but I prefer just Logan not Hortense" I chuckle softly mumbling "That's a girls name" He glares at me but has a soft smile lighting up his face. "Logan" He states his voice struggling to stay masculine. "Logan." I mock making him glare more. "Nice to meet ya Logan" I say grabbing his hand, trying my best to ignore the _electricity_ running through my veins as we touch.

* * *

You know that moment when you feeling everything weighing down on your shoulders, that look "Why cant you just get it?". I'm so used to that look right now. From the one boy that my mind is fighting to remember, but it's just not happening. The looks of despair, completely heartbreaking looks that he gives me, is tearing me apart, and I have no idea why. I don't even know this boy nor have I ever known this boy but how could you feel this way about someone you've never known? I just don't know anymore, I really don't know...

"Kendall" I hear the soft voice in front of me mutter my name, and I couldn't help the butterflies when I realized the country twang that made him say kindle. "Yeah Hortense?" he glares and I giggle, damn it! Kendall knight does not giggle! "Shut it Kendork" and then he's laughing and I just can't compare his laugh to anything. It's more than just plain amazing or adorable. It's just perfectly _imperfect_, like Hortense Logan Mitchell.

"So, what do you like?" I say trying to learn about Logan. "I love skating, hockey, and s-singing". I smile, three things in common. He smiles when he sees my smile. I feel the ignite in my chest, maybe he isn't crazy. Maybe I did love him, or maybe I still do, but its just buried away, hidden. I tend to hide the truth from myself, I lock it away and hope the key will never be found. Seems to me that Logan Mitchell is close to finding that key.

"How about you come back later" He looks kind of like a kicked puppy, my heart hurts. "Not that I want you to leave but I should rest". He nods a small smile brightening his face. I couldn't help but smile back. He waves to me as he exits my room "I'll be back" He says in a deep voice that I couldn't help but love. "Bye Logie" I chuckle softly when his smile widens.

"Hortense Logan Mitchell" I mutter under my breath, trying to figure out just who he is. Brown eyes. Beautiful. Button nose. Adorable. Crooked smile. Perfectly imperfectly. Kendall Knight, get a hold of yourself you can't think like this. He's a boy, you're a boy, it's just not right. But how could something that feels like _home_ be so wrong? Who are you Logan Mitchell, and what have you done to my heart? I take a deep breath in and the nurse checks my vitals. Ya know, that boy really loves you Mr. Knight" I nod taking in another deep breath. "Yeah, I know"

I end up falling sleep, awoken by the soft click of the door, my eyes fluttering open and I see Logan Mitchell. The main thought in my mind being that I wouldn't mind waking up to his face everyday. "I woke you up! I'm so sorry" he says sympathy seeping from every word. There was only one response I could think of.

_"Make me love you again, Logan Mitchell"_


	16. I remember something!

**2 Weeks Later**

I'm finally free from the hospital, colour has finally been introduced into my life instead of white EVERYTHING. I have to admit that these last two weeks have been absolutely amazing and I'm torn on how I should feel about it. Logan stopped by everyday right after school and on weekends he was in my room from eight to eight. I guess I should be annoyed since I am almost always with him but the truth is ( I'm about to sound pathetic) I miss him when he's at school. I miss the way his eyes light up when I call him Logie. Or the huge smile that graces his face when our hands touch.

* * *

"Kenny!" I turn around instantly regretting it, my blonde bimbo bitch of a girlfriend is running towards me. She runs embracing me tightly and I wince. "I had no idea you were awake, let alone out of the hospital" I roll my eyes when I hear the fake sympathy lacing every word. " I'm sorry, it's only been about a month, I've been.. um... catching up with Logan Mitchell. Her eyes darken and she pulls away, her smile falls straight off her face and shatters on the floor. "I thought we agreed that you'd leave that fag alone". My eyes widen, how could someone's words sound so poisonous? Then it hit me. She was talking about the sweet, meek, innocent boy, who would never hurt anyone.

"Don't you dare talk about him like that" I snarl. She scoffs pushing my chest causing me to lose my footing falling backwards hitting my head against the concrete. Hard. "Fag" she spits out disgusted. I hold my head as one sentence echo's throughout my mind. "I'm Logan Mitchell and I'm a rape victim " something sparks in my mind and I remember something about Logan Mitchell. A conversation really.

"Connor was the exact opposite of me. He was a junior in college and I was a junior in high school, he was captain of the football team I was the king of the nerds. He was a rapist and I wasn't. He was abusive and I couldn't hurt a fly"

I remember the pain in his voice as he confessed about his difficult past. I wish I could hold him. I stand wiping away any dirt on my clothes, my head pounding. I make a move to pass Jo. She digs her nails into my plaid covered arm. "Leave me alone!" I try to shake her off but her grip only tightens. "Either you leave him alone or I tell everyone you like it up the ass." My mouth opens and closes repeatedly. My brain processed what I should say. My body takes charge, I push past Jo. "Go fuck yourself" I jog towards my home but run to Logan's house instead. I knock fast and loud on his door. He opens the door, wiping his eyes sleepily, god isn't he just adorable? "Logan! I remember something!"

My smile fades when the realization that what I remembered was completely terrible. "What'd you remember?" he asks his smile slowly fading when he notices my smile disappeared. "You're a rape victim" I can hear his breath hitch and I see his eyes travel to the floor, a frown occupying his face. "You're right" he swallows. "Come here" I pull him into my arms, whispering kind things in his ear, running my fingers through his hair. After a few minutes I hear his breath even out. This cheeky bastard fell asleep on me. I keep one arm wrapped around his shoulders, the other going to his knees carefully picking him up, not wanting to wake him. I carry him inside laying him on the couch. His house is completely silent except for his small snores, which means his parents are out on business again.

I move, sitting in the rocking chair next to the couch. I pull out my phone and fiddle with it. Nothing could distract me enough to stop staring at the boy on the couch. He looked so innocent.. But he no longer had his innocence. That asshole stole it from him. My eyes start to water just as I hear a yawn come from the boy on the couch.

The next think I knew Logan was hugging me. "You don't need to cry Kenny " his voice is lower, a whisper almost, meant for my ears only. Then he said something that made my heart race "I love you" it was quieter then the first statement which made me think it was meant only for his own ears. I will say it back one day... I just need to be sure, completely sure. I know I like him but I'm going to keep that to myself for a while. "Let's watch a movie" Logan suggests, I nod. "Do you have popcorn?" I ask, he frowns. "Not to worry I'll go grab some from my house" I stroke his hair before standing and making my way from his house.

I wasn't gone for long. But long enough for something tragic to happen. Logan Mitchell was gone. And I knew who took him from the note on the door. Connor.


	17. The trailer

The link for the trailer I made for Neighbors is in the description box. Please watch!

Look on youtube using this- /watch?v lDiue7tvNB8


	18. He's gone

**Hello my beautiful readers and a happy new year!I'm sorry for such a short update but I just couldn't wait any longer for you guys to read this. It's terrible and it hurt to write it but it had to be said. So please review and I love each and every one of you. Much love XXX**

Logan is gone. He's gone. He was kidnapped. Connor. That sick son of a bitch. I grab the note from the door running inside. How did Connor even get here? Isn't he in jail. I run up to Logan's room. He had to write it down somewhere. I rummage through his bedside desk, nothing. Next, i search through his dresser, first drawer, zero . Second, again nothing. I was starting to get desperate. Last drawer I bite my lip as I searched. Yes! A journal, it had to be written in there.

I skimmed through the pages, some words triggering memories of logan making me even more determined to find him. To save him. I read as fast as i could and as little as I could. I wanted to invade his privacy as small as possible. Page after page nothing. Come on logan. Where's Connor. I flipped the page and something fell into my lap. A note from Connor.

_I'm coming for you Mitchell. -Cf_

I read the entry frowning when I notice certain tear stained areas. Logan's parents refused to press charges. You are fucking kidding me. Your son gets beaten and raped, and you don't even press charges against the fucker. That's grade A patenting for you. God, logan sounded so alone. So that explains why Connor is out. I really wish I could've been there to stop him. Logan didn't deserve this. No one does.

I need more. I continue flipping through until I get to a recent date and a note pasted to the page. _Guess who finally found you, you can't hide from me. -Cf_. That led up to a day ago, why didn't he tell me?

Connor's P.O.V

I slowly ran my hand up the shivering skin of the boy beneath me. "Now, now. There's nothing to be scared of" I teased. I grabbed to knife running it along the cheek of the boy. " so beautiful" he flinches, I glare. " I love you my Logie " again with the shuttering. " Say it back!" I snarl and he he shakes his head. I bring my empty hand up before back down leaving a red handprint and an echo of the sound of skin on skin contact. " I've missed you " I lean down smirking against his skin as I nibble on his ear. " P-Please Don't " How pathetic he's crying. " That ass of yours better be up for another round" he pulls at the restraints, I scoff. As if he could get away. But for good measure. I bring the knife back over the soft pain skin of Logan's stomach. I press down chuckling as he screams. I drag the knife up making a long deep cut. I smirk at my work dropping the knife, running my fingers through the blood trailing down his skin. I looked up and saw him fighting to keep his eyes open. " God, sometimes you're just so pathetic" I place my hand over the slice pressing down with all my force. The choke sobs and screams sound like music to my ears before the suddenly stop. Time to have my fun I think my grin growing wider.

{Sorry guys but here comes a little bit of a rape scene}

Logan's P.O.V.

I could help by cry as I woke up to blood running down my abdomine and Connor behind me smirking. The smirk was evil nothing like Kendall's which made my toes curls and insides burn. I gasped and sobbed at the same time as I felt it. Connor. He thrusts. I cry. I sob. I scream. I try to get away but there's nothing I can do. I'm trapped. I squirm and the knife is against my back pressing into my skin. He moans. How can someone find pleasure for this. I cry and scream and sob louder. I need Kendall, where's Kendall. Please. "Please help me." I mutter softly for my ears only before everything goes dark.

No one's P.O.V.

Kendall's frantic. Running around looking for anything. He doesn't know who to turn to or what to do. Meanwhile Connor is taking complete control of Logan's body not caring that Logan has long been passed out.


	19. Slut

**Logan's P.O.V.**

I woke up to nothing but dark. Complete and utter darkness around me, inside me. It's been almost a year since I'd seen Connor and to see his smirk made me feel sick , I pull against whatever is keeping me tied down. " I knew it was no use but maybe it was worth a try. Don't you agree? God, I'm talking to myself. How long have I been here?" I hear chuckle from one side of the room, "oh sweetheart, you've been out for 3 days lost quite a lot of blood." I see edges of light filling my vision, only then did I realize there was fabric covered my eyes. Take this off! I try and fail at being assertive as I wiggle in the restraints. I quickly still my movements, the new stinging pain on my right arm. It wasn't a pain from a knife, I knew that. It was worse, much worse, unbearable . Tears fill my eyes as I realize the sensation, burning. branding. The smell of burning skin fills the air. He's burning me. I scream but no sound comes out. I taste the salty tears as they fall from my eyes trailing down my cheeks. I hear him scoff. "Such a pathetic slut" my breath hitches at that word. He's called me that hundreds of times but it still hurts as if he was burning my insides.

I feel the burning sensation leave my skin, the feeling being replaced by a stinging pain. I squint my eyes, the bright light blinding as the fabric is removed. He unties my arm and brings my arm into view, my eyes immediately fill with tears. Kendall will never want me now. "Everyone will know what you are now" I gasp for air as he finishes his sentence. My vision blurs and I can no longer see the four letter word branded into my arm. "I-I'm not a slut" I choke out between sobs. Do I really sound that pathetic? "Oh honey" he strokes my cheek making me cringe. "You're worse than a slut, you're a used piece of trash" hearing someone say the words you always think is different. I've called myself used or trash dozens of times yet hearing him say it felt like having my heart ripped out.

**Connor's P.O.V.**

It drove me wild to see the way he reacted. Honestly, I didn't think he'd be so.. Pathetic. "I-I'm not a slut" I mock in a whiny desperate voice that sounded exactly like Logan. It only made him cry harder which made me laugh louder, eventually he passed out. Thank god. He was starting to annoy the hell out of me with all that Sobbing. After a few... smacks, he shut up. All his whining and begging for Kendall really pissed me off. So I decided that once he wake up he'll pay because he's mine. I don't want him talking about another asshole well I fuck him. He really is a slut who can't keep his mouth shut. I'm losing interest in him, won't need him much longer. I would get his little boyfriend but I feel like he'd fight back or plain and simple wouldn't be a good fuck.

**Kendall's P.O.V.**

I'm so tired. Tired of crying,of being confused, of being lost. The constant feeling of not knowing. All I do is worry. Worry that he's dead. Worry that Connor could be back, or watching. Watching me for weeks. How long has he known? How long has he been watching Logan?

Do you ever just think the world may end if you lose one person? That's Logan. One week ago I knew almost nothing about the boy that claimed to be in love with me. And now I'm here with tear stained cheeks, and bloodshot eyes. I love him and I have no idea if I'll ever be able to say it and hear him say it back. I let out a chocked sob and the whole class turns to stare at the back of the room. Where I am located and not paying attention. I got looks of shock mostly.. (I'm the hockey captain, I don't cry, definitely not in public. I didn't cry when I got slammed by a guy two times my size which ended in a dislocated shoulder and broken arm. Hell no, I just didn't cry) Others gave me looks of pity.

Ever since I told Jo to fuck off, my life has been hell. I wasn't kicked off the team, thankfully my coach has always been more of a dad then my real dad. He already means more to me than my real dad ever could because he accepted me for the real me. Not the shell of the person I was hiding in before anyone knew. I can tell that Carlos and James are worried about me. wed been friends since I was 7, and they had yet to see me cry before this week. Logan was the only person aside from my mom and sister.

My team mates have done nothing but show animosity towards me, the cheerleaders haven't been much better. I've kind of been on edge, all the disgusted looks make me angry. I don't know if I'm angry at Connor or Jo. There was even a time when I was angry at Logan. You shouldn't keep something like a fucking psycho stalker to yourself. I just don't understand how Connor found Logan.

**Jo's P.O.V. (WHAT!)**

I walk into the cafe a guilty feeling inside me. I sit at the far right corner waiting for _him_. "Hey babe" I hear _him_, turning around as his lips peck mine. "Hi Connor" I smile softly as return to his. "How's the fag?" never had I cringed at that term before hearing him say it and knowing exactly who he's talking about. "Kendall's a wreck, crying constantly. When he's not crying he's yelling or punching" I bite my lip wondering what he'll say to that.

"Logan doesn't have much longer" he smirks dragging his index finger around the rim of my cup. "You're giving him back?" I grimace a hint of happiness in my voice. "No gone. I'm bored with him" My mouth goes dry and my breath hitches as I try to speak. "Y-You cant" I stutter out finally. His eyes darken and his voice lowers.

_"I can do whatever I want"_


	20. Make me normal

**AN: Can i get at least five reviews on this chapter? i will not update until i get at least five hopefully more. Much love! Please enjoy **

Is it bad that i am happy that my "Logan" problem will be resolved soon enough? Finally Kendall won't have to chose between right and wrong, he'll always make the right choice. Female. I lock up once I'm home from the cafe, going to the living room turning on the TV. About a hour into the lifetime movie (I was sadly engrossed in) the door bell rang followed by an obnoxious pounding which I assumed is what the person called a knock. I reluctantly moved away from my movie. Opening the door, still staring at the screen. I turn to look at the person, my mouth falling open in shock. Kendall knight stood In front of me reeking of alcohol, bruises and cuts scattered all over his face. His knuckles broken and bloody. "Jo".

~*~*~* 2 Hours earlier~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~* Kendall's P.O.V.~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

I was questioning many things at the moment. Like why am I here? Why was I invited? Why am I drinking? "Fag...Bitch... Fairy" the words circled around me as I walked through the house. My blood boils when I hear someone bad mouthing Logan. "Little fairy deserves everything that's happening to him" the guy I don't recognize, he continues to talk about Logie. I chugged the drink in my hand before gripping the mystery man's shoulder pulling him to face me. "Jett" I half snarl half slur. My fist collides with his nose and I hear a crack. He groans in pain pushing me against the wall, I pull my arms away seconds before two of Jett's monkeys pin my arms against the wall. "Maybe we could punch the fag out of him" Jett mutters before assaulting my eye. They let my arms go after the take their turns injuring me. I tackle Jett, straddling his waist, doing exactly what they did to me.

By the end of it my knuckles bruised and Bloody, Jett's face looking similar to mine. I get up walking calmly to the bathroom. I grab one of the hand towels, locking the door when I hear steps approaching. I finally take a breath as the water runs over the towel, dampening the fabric. I turn off the water, bringing the damp towel to my face hissing as it makes contact with my bloody and bruised face. Once I clean my face, I open the door slowly. No ones there, thank god. I make a detour through the kitchen snagging an almost new bottle of vodka. I walk to the door calmly. Every hurtful name being thrown at me. I move quickly through the door, no longer wanting to hear anything they had to say.

I walk and walk, taking small sips of the burning liquid. I wanted to forget. I wanted to go back to normal. Before Logan. Back to Jo... Back to Jo. I repeat the statement in my head smirking as I chug the rest of the liquor, jogging to Jo's house.

~*~*~* Normal time~*~*~*~* Jo's P.O.V~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~**~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

I hear him mutter my name and I just stare utterly shocked as to why he's in front of me. "Make me _normal_ again". He slurs before slamming his lips against mine. I can't help but kiss back, his lips are so alluring. The taste of alcohol over powers the taste of Kendall as he shoves he tongue down my throat.

~*~*~*~*~*Logan's P.O.V~*~*~*~~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

What am I doing wrong? Everything I could possibly think of goes through my mind. And I have no idea what to do or say. Or how I can change it, and make it better. Tears start welling up in my eyes, and I have nothing to think about but everything I've done wrong and everything I regret. Everything I wish I could do. Like get married to Kendall, and have cute little babies, and graduate and go to college, and become a doctor and support him and your family. And let him do his hockey dream, be his cheerleader. Just be there for him. And be his husband, and everything I want to do but I'll never get to do.

I just want to be with Kendall, I don't want to be here anymore. My mind was racing as Connor walks into the room. A sick smirk on his face. I couldn't help but feel this pit in my stomach, as if today was the day he's going to finally kill me. It's been weeks... I haven't heard any attempt from Kendall, I've given up. I've stopped trying to save myself. There's no reason I should save myself. If Kendall doesn't want me, I have no reason to be here. Kendall's the reason I care, so if he doesn't care then why should I? Connor is constantly gone and when he's here he's either raping or beating me. I have scars and burns scattered all over my body, bruises and cuts everywhere. What ever I'm strapped to is bloody from all the pain I've gone through. I don't know how much longer I can take this or how much longer I can entertain Connor. I think this might be the end of me.

So I guess this is my goodbye note to everyone. My I love you guys, thanks for being so awesome... but it's the thing you'll never get to see because it's all in my head and the words will never be uttered because I'm dead. It's okay I guess. I-I love you Kendall, it's the only thing i really want to get across. Thank you James and Carlos for being my friends. But honestly i'm going to miss Katie and Mama Knight so much. Thank you for being there for me when parents weren't. You two are more of a family to me than my actual mom and dad. For going through the same pain as me, for crying with me, for everything. I just wish that Kendall's memory would've came back... that he would've loved me back. But, i love you Kendall, i loved you so much, I'm sorry we can't grow old together and i'm sorry you can't hear me say it to you. And i'm sorry, so so sorry. I break down in tears, Connor smirk widening. Connor drags the blade over my neck and i can't help but think... Bye Kendall, I love you...

As screams of pain and pleasure fill the air, thoughts of the other fills their minds.


	21. Missed

Logan Mitchell will be greatly missed...

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~* Kendall P.O.V ~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

Jo spilled everything after I made one of the biggest mistakes of my life. I took everything she told me to the police. I told them that Connor was the one that kidnapped him . I told him that they were still in town, that I just didn't know where exactly. To say that they didn't believe me would be an understatement. They put me in some kind of waiting room, probably thinking that I was mad. I pace back and forward, my eyes squeezed shut, my thoughts racing. The longer they wait, the longer I have to wait before being with my Logan . I refuse to think of Logan any other way.

He's fine, he's alive, he'll be found, he has to be found.

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~* Officer Griffin P.O.V ~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

This boy ran into my office, slightly out of breath. He mumbled words like "help", "town", "Logan". Before he stopped, I assumed to catch his breath. My eyebrows furrow as I try to decipher what he is trying to say. I focus on the destressed look in his emerald eyes. That makes sense with the word help he uttered earlier. I skipped the word town not wanting to confuse myself even more. The last one I chose to believe was a name. Logan, it sounds so fimilar, "Logan" I repeated under my breath until it hit me. Logan Mitchell, the boy who'd be missing for a little more than a month. Town,in town? Out of town? I questioned in my head. Who was this boy and how did he know?

He calmed down but continued to ramble, he was almost slurring his words which caused me to wonder if his evidence on the Logan Mitchell case was true. "Stop, what's your name son?" I say when he takes a breath, his mouth opening to continue his speech. " Kendall knight, sir". He looks down obviously embarrassed for his rambling. "Now, slowly tell me what's going on " I've heard of the boy, from my daughter Mercades, who always talked about the hockey captain that constantly was the reason for their victory. "Logan Mitchell was kidnapped by a boy named Connor, who happens to be my ex girlfriend's new boyfriend" he stops, frowning for some unknown reason, it gives me time to process everything that he's said. Jo Taylor, one of Mercedes' friends. Captain of the cheerleading squas. "How do you know Connor is the one that took him?" I ask he opens his mouth starting to reply but all I could focus on was the smell of alcohol creeping it's way to my nose, burning the insides of my nose. "Kendall, are you under the influence of alcohol?"

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~* End flashback~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

Tears welled in 's eyes, she sniffled, the tears slipping from her eyes, running down her cheeks. "We'd also like to remember kendall knight at this time". She chokes on a sob " My baby" she whispers.

**AN. I'm sorry for such a short chapter but I'll update as soon as you guys get four reviews, I love you guys. Please don't hate me. Everything will be explained soon enough. **


	22. The girl

****AN: Surprise! An update! I love all of you lovely readers and I hope you all had a happy easter! Please review! I absolutely love reading them! xx.****

**~*~***~**~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~**~*~*~*~*Kendall's P.O.V. ~*~***~**~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~**~*~*~*~***

It took hours for them to believe me. What was I supposed to do? Go back in time and make sure I never drink? Since that's totally possible. They wouldn't even let me leave afraid for my "health". I can't help the tears that fall; I'm so close to Logan but still so far away from me. I think about everything from the night before, I kissed Jo. I frown, my own words filling my mind. Normal, how many times did I think that, that lie would somehow help me? I bite my lip, holding in whimpers when I remember everything else I did last night, I stopped myself, and well Jo stopped me. I kissed her, but that's all it'll ever be. A drunken mistake. If you're wondering. No. No, I did not fuck her. Almost. But I didn't. I could get myself to do it. All I could think about was Logan. I love him. I want him. I need him.

~*~***~**~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~**~*~*~*~*No one's P.O.V. ~*~***~**~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~**~*~*~*~*

The station was almost silent, only thing heard throughout the building was the rustle of paper, the patter of feet walking briskly through the halls. They were desperate to find the boy. They were bordering on a month of him missing. They were trying their hardest to locate Connor since he knows the location of Logan. They contacted Josephine, in attempt of getting Carter to meet her. It took hours before she heard back from him. He said yes. The police wired Jo as a precaution. The girl tried and tried to get the address, the boy would not budge. He would make small comments that would almost hint at the location. Safe. Abandoned. Scream proof. Away. But close.

**~*~***~**~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~**~*~*~*~*Jo's P.O.V. ~*~***~**~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~**~*~*~*~***

I'm twitchy, Connor scares me. Plain and simple. He says he loves me but I don't believe he wouldn't hesitate to hurt me or kill me. I can just picture myself and Logan's positions, screaming your name, bleeding to death. Death. He's not dead. I frown taking my bottom lip between my teeth, chewing roughly as the eyes me. My lip quivers between my teeth, and slips away, fumbling with my ring he gave me of my index finger. "Kitten, are you okay?". The sweet tone is laced with suspicion as i nod slowly, clearing my throat "I just haven't been myself lately" He nods, his eye narrowing momentarily before grinning softly at me. I release a breath i did not know I was holding, my body relaxing when i see his smile. "Darling, I want to take you somewhere." My body tenses again, my lip quivers as i nod. He stands; I repeat the action, holding my breath as he wraps his arm around my waist, pulling me into his side as he leads me to his car, opening the matrix door, squeezing my hip before releasing my side, planting his lips to my temple. I shiver as i get in to the car, and we begin our journey. The police are already tracking my phone. Just as a precaution. I relax a great amount when I receive a text from Kendall saying he's nearby and everything will be fine. I'm not alone.

By god, I feel alone as he pulls over. i glance around curiously, the house laying silently within the overgrown grass. The green contrasting roughly against the pale brown of the rotting wood. The house was a mixture of well kept new reddish brown wood of the door and the window panes. I run my fingers along the top of the door, looking out the window as I grasp the lock, slowly opening the door, the click waking me back into reality, my feet sinking into the moist ground.

I stare at the ground, gasping softly when he interlaces his fingers with mine, pulling me along, the floor becoming hard below my feet. So close. My breath becomes heavy, my throat dry as he opens the door, the creaking making me anxious, My eyes wide, trying to adjust to the midnight inside, a stream of daylight. I squint, my eyes affected by the pitch black. What shall I see when the lights go up? The silence scares me.

It's him, his eyes are dead much like his body, he flicks his eyes over to me before letting them drop frightened. He… He is scared of me? I chew desperately on my bottom lip, attempting to grasp on to reality yet again. My eyes run over his body, quickly. He is naked, that makes my stomach twist. My god, the things this boy has been through. My eyes examine the bleeding and bruised body. Wait, my eyes widen, my breath hitches. Four letters have been burned into his red inflamed skin on his arm.

"What have you done?" The small voice spills from my body, without recognition on my part. The tiny voice sounded so... scared, so vulnerable, so shocked. His lips curl into a smirk the makes my insides squirm well my feet stay flat against the floor, still, shocked, frozen in place, feeling as if I'll be stuck in this moment for the rest of my life.

Stuck for the rest of my life, staring at the frightened, abused, naked boy. "If you keep your mouth open like that, you'll catch bugs" Connor lets out a low throaty laugh, running his hand under my chin, pushing it closed, making me silently choke, forgetting how to breathe, questioning if I really want to continue, forever stuck. I turn around, my breath shaky, uneven. Practically panting as if I'd just ran a mile, but I didn't. It felt as if my feet had just been kicked out from under me, my knees hitting the ground, tiny fists pressed to the ground. Was that me whimpering? I turn again, just my head this time, I could feel my shoulders slump. Time paused yet still moving at super speed, second feel like hours, minutes like days but I'm stuck. Stuck in the moment I want to forget. There's a click of the lock and the new darkness surrounds me, filling my eyes, my heart.

"Do you know what he's been through?" there is a sarcastic tone to the sentence laced with fake sympathy. "So much pain" he presses down on Logan's stomach emitting a scream, I didn't know was possible from his body. What could he be pressing on to be that painful? I feel Connor's thumb drag along my cheek. He leans down and blows cool air on my now wet skin, I shiver. Wait, wet skin? I take control over my body,pressing my palm to my cheek before bringing it into view. Red. Oh red. Blood red. I have Logan's blood on my body, I whimper, he smirks. I think he's lost it, I think he never had it to begin. Does he actually find this pleasurable?

I bite my lip glancing down at the rotting floor, my breath hitches when I notice the tint of red on the floor. There's fucking blood everywhere. I heave, my bottom lip quivers, teeth chattering as if the air surrounding me just dropped thirty degrees. Every part of my body feels sick.. My back arches, retching only for nothing. "Are you going to kill him?" the words surprise me more than I assume him. But the voice that left my body surprised me more. For the first time since I'd been there I heard Logan. It was a faint mix of a whimper and whisper, and it sounded a lot like Kendall.

I feel Connor grasp my arm pulling me up. I shiver uncontrollably, my heart racing when a light hits his silver blade in hand.. Pulling me with him as he approaches Logan... Three steps away. Two. One.

Stop! I scream internally. Tears trailing down my cheeks. Never in a million years did I think I'd be crying over Logan. At least not like this. Him strapped to a table. About to be murdered by his ex-boyfriend. Who happens to now be my boyfriend! What happened to the normal teenager life?! I used to have it all. Then Logan had to show up and my life crumbles away. I move to the background of everyone's life, because the whole town is now focused on the missing boy. Well news flash, that missing boy is laying in front of me.

Light, light everywhere. "Put your hands up and step away from the boy!" Wow. Even in a hostage situation I'm chop liver. The deep familiar voice fills the air. Kendall? Everything moves so swiftly. It's not Kendall moving but police pouring in. My hands fly down to the pinch at my lower stomach, before agonizing pain fills my body. An arm wraps around my throat, holding me up as I pull my hands away, the red on them makes me sob.

"You said nothing about the girl"


	23. Hello Guys

Hello guys….

I have something I need to tell you all.

I don't want to lie to you anymore.

I have written some of my best work for you guys.

Shipping Kogan was really amazing, But…

I feel like I am not a Kogan shipper anymore.

This is so hard to admit but I just have lost my inspiration for my writing. You can not even imagine. I have tried every possible thing to keep my writing and inspiration here but it has slipped out from my fingers.

I'm so sorry.

But…

As of now all of my stories are on hiatus till further knowledge.

There is something not so bad that I would also like to announce. I ship Larry. Louis and harry. I don't know if any of you ship Larry or even really know what it is but I have a wattpad and an Ao3 account that you guys could follow and there just might be some more kogan updates.

I love you all and possibly for the last time I leave you a giant thank you for all your support and kind reviews. Much love.

-Sky xx


	24. I'm baaaack!

Hi there guys.

It's been a while hasn't it?

I'm happy to announce that I am officially coming off of hiatus.

I've immersed myself in my own life and I've got this bubbly feeling well reading another kogan fic for the first time in months, i think it's about time you guys get an ending to this tragic love story.

I love you all very much and I'll talk to you guys soon!

Much love.

Sky. xx


	25. Not Quite Over

His breath caught in his throat when the noise rang throughout the room. He squeezed his eyes tight, if he didn't see it, it didn't happen. He could no longer take the feeling of suspense that was rapidly filling his entire being faster than his heart was racing in his chest. He bit his tongue as a scream filled the air. A metallic taste filled his mouth as he placed the familiarity of the voice now echoing throughout his thoughts and the room he remains stuck in. He knew that voice. He loved that voice.

_One never thinks about what they would do if the one they love, suddenly, died. They do not just prepare for such a heartbreak. They would not think about the pain that the future would hold. Or the constant reminders. _

_Or in this case, the fact that the one shall never know that they were in fact, madly, in love with them. _

_Love is a funny thing. It hurts, it can be absolutely joyous, and sometimes, if you're lucky, it can make you forget. The life you were forced to live previously. The pain you had to face alone. Love is that sudden helping hand that guides you through life without a worry, well as I said, if you're lucky. _

He willed himself to crack one eye open, his heart begged his mind to stop, but he couldn't not see the love of his life. Even if it was the love of his life taking his last breath.

_"I love you" it means so much and yet could mean so little at the same time. It could define a relationship. It could break someone's heart, depending on the response back or the lack of. This isn't a typical love story, this isn't boy meets girl and they fall in love. It's more than that. It was a journey of finding one's self and in the process of such falling in love. Falling in love with your best friend. _

There was a strangled gasp, the one noise conveyed the immense pain he was living, it sent shudders down my body. I_ love you. I_ thought. Say it. Scream it. Yell it. Don't let them die without knowing how you feel he thinks. He opens his mouth and nothing. He can't seem to make a noise.

_Silence. Something that someone may love and something that someone may hate. something that separates everyone as a whole , makes everyone an individual. The silence brings on different feelings, new emotions. Some scary, some daring and some exciting and new. Silence is a time to think. Whether the thinking be something good or something reched, whether it be much needed or too much. _

_When everything is life and death. You may feel like there's nothing left. Instead of love and trust and laughter, what you get is happy never after. But deep down all you what is love. The pure kind we all dream of. But we cannot escape the past. So you and I will never last..._


End file.
